


I Don't Want To Lose

by BigWordsAndSuch



Category: Atypical (TV 2017)
Genre: Atypical - Freeform, Cazzie, F/F, Season 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-24
Updated: 2018-12-03
Packaged: 2019-08-07 03:34:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 19,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16400570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BigWordsAndSuch/pseuds/BigWordsAndSuch
Summary: Season 2 from Izzie's Point of View.It's just been bugging my brain what Izzie was thinking the entire season....So here it is!





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

  
"IZZIE! WAKE UP IZZIE!!!"

  
Izzie's eyes opened slightly, just enough to see her 8 year old sister about an inch from her face, and her 6 year old brother screaming her name in the background.  
"It's the last day of winter break, can you guys please let me sleep?"

  
"It's the last day of break, we want to play!"

  
Izzie had to admit, the whispering from her sister, was a lot more soothing to her wake up process than Mike's "scream until she moves technique." Slowly, she made her way past her siblings, and to the bathroom.

  
Her mom wasn't home. She was almost never home, and when she was, she was high. Her grandma, watched over the kids when when she could and kindly took her baby sister Lydia for the evening and day so she could "Enjoy her last day of break." She still didn't have the full freedom of babysitting duties she wanted, but this did open up the possibilities of her day.

  
"So this means we are going to play right?"

  
"Yes Gwen. Both of you get dressed, we are going to the club."

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
While most of her classmates would be headed to a lavish country club, Izzie and her siblings made their way to the local Boys and Girls Club. Unless her mom won the lottery, she would never set foot into one of the snooty clubs. She dropped the kids off at open gym, and they sprinted across the room, to their respective friends as soon as the door opened. _I guess running must be a genetic thing in this family_ She thought.

  
She was relieved to find her favorite treadmill was available as she entered the weight room. She needed to train for cross-country, but she couldn't drag her siblings into the woods, so this would have to do. Izzie ran for 2 hours with laser focus. Running was her getaway, her way to forget all the responsibilities. Although she knew running would never be a good enough excuse to leave this town, or her family behind, it was a good way to escape for a while.

  
But these past two weeks, her runs have had a different mindset. She pushed herself to the limit from start to finish. A new girl would be arriving at Clayton Prep in the morning. Izzy had heard things about her both good and bad, but mostly she heard that she was fast. There was no doubt in Izzie's mind that the new girl would be great for the team, but endlessly bad for her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie slowly got of the car, careful not to slam the door of Nate's car. She swore her boyfriend cared more about his stupid car, more than her. He was one of those rich Clayton Prep kids, with endless money, and a cocky attitude. But he was nice to her from day one, and showed her the ropes of now to navigate this maze like school. She found he was one of the few people she could tolerate. Plus, he knew all about her home life, and how she was only here because she had a scholarship, and never once judged her for it. So, despite knowing something was missing from their relationship, and knowing that they wouldn't spend forever together, Nate was the perfect person to spend now with. However long that might be.

  
As she approached the courtyard, Izzie saw a tall skinny girl standing alone awkwardly. This was her, the new girl sent her to steal her top runner position. She didn't understand why coach wanted her to show this girl around. Just because she was captain didn't mean she had to be nice.

  
Izzie tapped the new girl on the shoulder. She was taken aback, even just for a moment. As Casey spun around to meet her, Izzie could see that she was in fact tall, and skinny. Much taller, and much skinnier than herself. She had short shoulder length brown hair and Izzie couldn't help but wonder if her hair got in her eyes when she ran. A mix of jealously and curiosity filled her.

  
She forced out a "Hey."

  
"Hi, you're Izzie, right? I'm Casey. I'm the Sorry, you know that. I'm, like, super nervous."

  
_Obviously_

Izzie bit her inner lip, to avoid a snarky comment from coming out.

  
"Oh, I'm the new kid from Newton."

  
"Look, new kid from Newton."

  
Izzie was already annoyed at this conversation. She decided to let this girl know just where she stands her.

  
"Casey is my name, actually."

  
_Not anymore_

  
"I'm sure you were hot shit at your last crappy school, but-"

  
"Wow, warm welcome. They should put you in the orientation video."

  
_Did she really just interupt me?_

  
"But I've heard about you."

  
"Good things?"

  
Izzie had to do everything in her power not to laugh. No, not good things.

  
"You punched a girl in the face and got suspended, so, no. I've worked my ass off to build this team and we don't need any drama."

  
It was true, when Izzie first arrived, this team was a mess. They were good, but filled with drama, to the point where they almost disbanded the team. The last thing she needed was another entitled rich girl coming in here, adding negativity to the team.

  
"I don't want any drama either."

  
"Don't care. Just handle yourself."

  
The conversation was over. Izzie walked past Casey. She was not what Izzie expected. I mean, she didn't know what she expected out of the new girl, but this was not it. Even so, She felt as though this was a victory, she said what she needed to. With this small victory Izzie was certain that by the end of the school year, that she would be on top. She heard the new girls voice behind her, and slowly stopped, and spun around to face Casey.

  
"Um Coach said you were going to show me around. Is that-"

  
Happy she got to be the one to interupt this time. She pointed to the large building behind her.

  
"Classes are in there. Good luck"


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzie's first few days back from break

The school day was finally over, and the torture that was classes was finally rewarded with track practice. As her and the rest of the team were stretching when New Girl Newton walked up, Late of course. It crossed Izzie's mind to make a comment on her tardiness, but Izzie knew how complicated the school grounds where. She knew the new girl wouldn't have been late if Izzie was there to show her around.

  
"You look tired, Newton. Tough day?"

  
She reminded herself earlier in the day that she was the captain of this team. She needed to be nice, at least the rest of the team needed to see her being nice.

  
"No. It's been great."

  
She could hear the slight sarcasm in the new girls voice. Either that or she remember how awful her first day was until she met Nate. She knew the first day was always awful.

  
"Find your way around alright?"

  
"Yeah. Actually, this super helpful girl showed me around, so-"

  
Now she knew it was sarcasm. The other girls on the team welcomed Casey by being friendly, at least friendly for them. Izzie had decided to just stand back and enjoy the show. Penelope decided to break the best way she knew how.

  
"Are you bulimic?"

  
_Blunt and to the point_

  
"No."

  
"Oh, good. I don't need those kind of influences in my life."

  
Penelope was always honest, Izzie had to give her that. She had gone through some stuff, but came out the other side a better person because of it. Izzie could help but respect her, despite the lavish life she led. Quinn on the other hand, well, Izzie wasn't sure why she was even on the team. She didn't take it seriously half the time. Honestly she didn't take anything too seriously. She wasn't sure if she would be friends with Quinn had she not been on the team.

  
"Cool shoes. My mom made me get new ones for Christmas, which is dumb 'cause we were in Paris and the Euro conversion is ridic. I like when they're old and worn, like yours."

  
Izzie looked down at the new girls sneakers. They were dirty, and broken in just like hers. She had always hated new sneakers for running. She only got new shoes when she absolutely needed them, and even when she did, they certainly weren't the $100 plus dollar ones her teammates bought new every season. When she finally saved up and bought new ones, she would have them worn in, by the time the season started anyway.

  
The girls went back to their usual pre-practice chit chat. Izzie tried to focus on stretching, eager to get out on the cross country path.

  
"We were in Aspen again. So boring."

  
"My parents are on this kick, they take us to a European city each year. Exhausting."

  
No matter how many times the team talked about their lavish trips, and expensive gifts, it never ceased to make Izzie's stomach drop a little. She knew deep down she would never have those luxuries, she would never truly fit in with anyone at this school.

  
"What'd you do for break?

  
Izzie looked down and prayed they weren't asking her. She didn't want to have to admit that the most exciting thing she did was go to the mall with her grandma, hoping for post Christmas sales, but didn't actually buy anything. But then she heard Casey's voice.

  
"Um Nothing, really. Went to Target a couple times."

  
This caused Izzie to finally look up. The other girls laughed, but she knew the tall girl in front of her wasn't joking. Once again, Casey was proving to be the opposite of what Izzie was expecting. Casey shook out her limbs a bit.

  
"Um I think I'm stretched. Is this the path, here?"

  
There was a dull "yeah" from the group and she went on her way.

  
"She's hilarious."

  
Shes something alright

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie was tired of roaming the halls in search of Nate. She decided to head towards his locker, in hopes that he may have stopped there before the bell. As she rounded the corner, she saw Nate....and Casey. She wasn't jealous, Nate wasn't the type of guy to cheat, or flirt with other girls, especially not right in front of her nose. Still, she needed to let the new girl know that Nate was hers. She yelled out his name, as she walked up and kissed him, turning to Casey immediately after.

  
"I see you met Newton."

  
"I thought your name was Casey."

  
_Mission Accomplished_

  
"Bye, Newton."

  
Nate replied slightly confused, but Izzie didn't have time to explain the situation, nor did she care to. She had done what she needed to and decided to get to class, grabbing Nate and dragging him away from the new girl. She looked to Casey's face for a reaction, but didn't really find one.

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie and Nate laid on his bed, his huge bed, in his huge room. His closet was the size of her room. She never felt completely comfortable in his house but she always spend her evenings with Nate, unless of course her grandma couldn't watch the kids. He was another nice distraction from life.

  
"What was that before? With you and Casey? How do you even know her?"

  
"Newton is the new girl on the track team."

  
The question annoyed Izzie, she didn't want to spend her time talking about the new girl. She didn't want to bring anymore attention to her than there already was.

  
"Ohh right, how could I forget about her? Shes the reason, you spent all your free time running over break."

  
It was true, Izzie did avoid him a bit over break. Part of it was to run, but she hated the holidays with Nate. They had lavish parties, and gave each other expensive gifts. Izzie didn't fit into his world.

  
"So, what's she like?"

  
He was really going to press the issue.

  
"I don't know Nate. You seemed to be getting to know her pretty well earlier. Maybe you can tell me."

  
That came out a lot more hostile than she had planned it. Nate just smiled, he thought she was jealous.

  
"I'm not jealous. At least not that you were talking to her. She's just.....Shes a great runner. And no matter how hard I work, shes always going to be better than me. She's going to swoop in here and be the best."

  
She couldn't believe she admitted it, to Nate of all people. She never really allowed herself to open up to him all the way. She didn't even tell him everything about what went on at home. Although, having Casey there was pushing her to be even better, she knew she was pushing Casey the same way.

  
"I just don't want to lose to her"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am attempting to post an "episode at a time"
> 
> As always if you like it let me know!!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzie and Newton get know each other

****The air was crisp but warmer than usual. It never got cold enough to really snow there, but it certainly did get chilly. When the weather started to warm up, the running paths turned to mud, and the girls spent their days on the track. Today was one of those days. The team had been running for at least 4 laps. But it was Izzie and Casey leading the pack. Casey was a bit ahead, so Izzie picked up speed and ran to her side.

  
"You're slowing down, Newton."

  
Casey sped up, which caused Izzie to speed up, causing both of them to reach a full on sprint.

  
"Hey, this isn't a sprint. Knock it off, ladies!"

  
The girls just kept running. Izzie looked over at Casey for a split second to see if she was tired too. She quickly realized neither one would slow down. Her feet were moving faster than the rest of her, and she lost her balance for a split second. Izzie came down on the side of her foot and crashed onto the track below. Casey had won, just like she feared. A sharp pain tore through Izzie's wrist, she had landed right on it. She grabbed it in hopes the pressure would help..it didn't.

  
Casey stopped running immediately and just stared at Izzie on the ground, as Coach Crowley ran to Izzie's side. Casey was breathing heavy and panting and it made Izzie happy to know that Casey was tired from the sprint.

  
"Oh, my God, are you okay?"

  
Izzie was literally crawling on the track, as the other girls just kept running by. Izzie knew what had really happened, but couldn't let herself face the truth of it. She also wouldn't let the other girls see her lose.

  
"You pushed me."

  
Casey was taken aback by the accusation. She looked back and forth between Izzie, and coach panting heavily the entire time.

  
"No... I didn't."

  
Izzie slowly got up. She knew her wrist would be okay, and shook her head when coach asked if she was hurt. Coach was not convinced.

  
"Well we need to get some ice on it to be safe. Casey your coming too."

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
"I won't have this on my team. I just won't, do you understand me?"

  
The girls were sitting side by side in front of Crowley's desk. She was looking back and forth at both of them. Making sure they both knew this lecture was from them.

  
"You don't have to love each other, but you have to love each other."

  
 _That will never happen_. Izzie thought to herself.

  
"Casey, you'll ice Izzie's wrist and you'll both stay in here until you can get along."

  
Izzie shook her head mildly in disbelief. This plan was never going to work. She would never get along with Casey. But she wasn't going to speak up to the coach. She knew better than that. Coach Crowley got up to leave, she still had a practice going on outside. Casey's eyes followed her to the door before trying to make a last ditch effort to get them out of the situation.

  
"Actually, I think we worked it out."

  
"You know what? No, you didn't."

  
Casey couldn't hide the frustration on her face. The two of them sat in silence. But Izzie couldn't help but notice Newton looking at her out of the corner of her eye. But of course, Izzie wouldn't have noticed that if she wasn't doing the same thing herself.

  
Casey leaned forward and grabbed the ice pack of the desk.

  
_Does this weirdo really think i'm going to let her ice my hand?_

  
Izzie grabbed the blue pack out of Casey's hand.

  
"I can do it myself."

  
She wrapped the ice pack around her wrist before realizing what she needed to do. She let out a sigh.

  
"I need to make a phone call, but someone pushed me, - so now I can't use my wrist."

  
The hostility in her voice was clear as day.

  
"I didn't push you. I was nowhere near you."

  
"Whatever."

  
Izzie shook her head. She still had to ask Casey, and she still needed to make the phone call.

  
"Can you just hand me my phone out of my backpack, please?"

  
She avoided looking directly at the new girl.

"Fine, but I didn't push you."

  
Casey was frustrated, she got up and grabbed the phone while muttering under her breath.

  
"I'm so sick of this stupid school and this stupid track team."

  
_If you are so sick of it, why don't you quit?_

  
Izzie dialed her grandma's number. She hated that she had to make this call. Casey wouldn't look at her the same after it. She was sure Casey would look at her with pity, and that was the last thing Izzie wanted.

  
"Hey, it's Izzie. I need you to watch the baby for an extra couple of hours."

  
Her grandma did her best to accommodate Izzie. She knew the young girl needed a life of her own too. So this call was no problem.

  
"Okay. Great. Bye."

  
She prepared for what came next, still avoiding eye contact.

  
"Baby? Do you have a kid?"

  
Casey's voice sounded more curious than judgmental. Yet the question still annoyed Izzie to no end. Casey didn't have a right to ask it. But she couldn't help but answer.

  
"Of course not, I'm not a moron. My mother is."

  
Casey Immediately responded. Quicker than most would with her answer.

  
"Hey, mine too."

  
Casey smiled at herself, proud that she said it.

  
"Not that it's any of your business, but I take care of my three siblings."

  
"You do?"

  
The tone in Casey's voice implied confusion. But there wasn't much to be confused about. Izzie could feel Casey looking at her, but couldn't allow herself to look back.

  
"Yeah."

  
"So, you're not a bazillionaire?"

  
"Not yet."

  
It was in that moment that Izzie realized that Newton thought she was one of these rich stuck up brats. Part of her was slightly offended, but the other was proud of herself for blending in so well. Casey moved her way closer, and sat on the desk. Izzie didn't have a choice but to look at her.

  
"My brother has autism, so I'm, like constantly looking out for him."

  
"I didn't know that."

  
Coach was right, they had a lot more in common than she had thought. This solidified that Casey wasn't one of those rich stuck up girls either. For the first time, she felt like she could be herself in this school.

  
"Dude, how would you know that? You, like, barely talk to me."

  
Casey looked her up and down, almost as it she was afraid of the repercussions of the words coming out of her mouth. Izzie couldn't help but laugh.

  
"I talk to you. I just say mean things.

  
Both girls erupted into laughter. Izzie was confused as to how she felt this comfortable with Casey this quickly, when she hated her an hour ago. The laughter died down, and silence reentered the room.

  
"You know, you are not what I expected."

  
The feeling is mutual. Although, she would never be able to admit that. But she wasn't surprised by the statement.

  
"Well, I'm not like the other girls. I don't get to mess up. Last year Penelope drove her car into a tree and guess what happened to her? Her parents bought her a new car."  
She noticed that Casey hadn't taken her eyes off of her once.

  
"And Quinn has vodka in her locker just in case she gets bored."  
  
"Really?"

  
"Yep. And, I think, a bikini, for some reason."

  
This caused both the girls to laugh, and Casey shook her head in disbelief causing her to take her eyes off Izzie.

  
"But for me this school, what I do here, it matters. I feel like I have to be perfect, all the time, and it's exhausting."

  
What was she doing? Why was she opening up to Newton? Why was it so easy to open up to her? Casey had a look like a light bulb just lit above her head.

  
"Is that why you were such a dick to me?"

  
_Ah Shit_

  
"Probably...Or I might just be a dick."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  


  
"I read about this guy in Vermont. I think it was Vermont. And he runs a hundred miles at a time. Like, he will literally walk out of his house and go on a hundred-mile run."

  
By Coach Crowley's standards they could left a while ago. But the two girls still sat in the room. Just....talking.

  
"Dude, get a job."

  
Izzie sat in the same chair she had been, and Casey was Sprawled out on the couch.

  
"Actually, when I read it, I thought it was great. That kind of freedom? But now I don't know."

  
"What do you mean?"

  
"I mean Like, I think it was dumb to think that I could ever leave here. Sam and my dad, they they need me.I used to want to get as far away from this place as possible, but now I'm not really sure that I ever will."

  
Most people start a friendship with small talk. But they were diving into the deep conversation as if they had known each other for years. Izzie felt for Casey, she knew she wasn't going to leave this town. She was at this amazing school, that would give her the opportunity to move on to great colleges, and a better life. But deep down she knew she couldn't go. She had an idea.

"Screw that. I'll be right back."

  
She ran down the hall to Quinn's locker. Quinn had given Izzie her locker combo earlier in the year. She opened it up, and searched through the messy locker until she found what she was looking for. She made her way back into the office putting the bottle behind her back before entering.

  
"I'm tired of trying to be perfect all the time. How about, for once, we stop caring about everyone else?"

  
She pulled the bottle of vodka out from behind her back.

  
"I raided Quinn's locker."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
They were both curled up on opposite sides of the small couch. Izzy had poured half the bottle into Coach's coffee mug for Casey while she drank straight from the bottle. It was cheap vodka, and tasted awful, but they drank it anyway. Izzie kept on being surprised at how much she opened up to Casey, telling her things she hadn't told anyone else. And then the topic of her mom came up.

  
"So....You're mom is moron too huh?"

  
Every instinct she had was tilling Izzie to stop talking, but she couldn't.

  
"I mean, when I was younger she was really together and fun. Then my dad left and she had an injury at work and started taking painkillers and just spiraled from there."

  
The Vodka had to had to have been the cause of this right? She wasn't even thinking at this point...Just talking.

  
"Sucks. It's like my life's goal to be nothing like her."

  
"Oh, my God, dude, me too."

  
Despite the content, they were both laughing and smiling. Just embracing this rare moment. Casey stuck her Clayton coffee mug out.

  
"Cheers."

  
They clinked their glasses together. the force they applied, indicated that they were no longer sober. They both took a sip, and Casey grunted at how awful it tasted.

  
"To be honest, I think half the reason why I spend so much time with Nate is because I don't want to go home."

  
She couldn't believe she had said it out loud. She couldn't believe she was telling her any of this.

  
"Not because he's your boyfriend and you love him very much?"

  
Casey's words slurred a bit, and Izzie had to rest her head on her hand.

  
"No, Nate's awesome. But sometimes it just feels not quite right with him."

  
She knew it was true. From the moment they started dating, things were always a bit off. They did all the things a normal couple would do. It just seemed like a lot of the time Izzie wouldn't care if they didn't.

  
"Like he's from a different planet and won't ever know what it's like on my planet."

  
Casey nodded her head in agreement. Almost to say "I get you girl." This caused Izzie to laugh.

  
"You ever feel that way with Evan?"

  
"No. No, not really."

  
Casey chuckled as chuckled as she said it, and Izzie couldnt figure out why. Either way she wondered how it must feel to have that sort of relationship.

  
"Lucky ho. Jeez."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like it let me know!!!!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short little chapter of Izzie's night after detention, and an ex comes back "Home"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible Trigger Warning: There is some swearing, and mild verbally abusive situations. Things are getting serious in Izzie's world.

They ended up finishing the bottle, and Izzie called Nate to come pick them up. He couldn't have been prouder that he girlfriend got drunk on school property. She wondered how Evan would react. As they pulled up to Evan's house, Casey stumbled out of the car. She slammed the back seat door, and it make Izzie laugh at how annoyed Nate was in that moment. Casey approached Izzie's window as she rolled it down.

  
"You know, i actually had a lot of fun with you tonight!"

  
"Yeah, me too! I'm glad you pushed me down today."

  
Izzie couldn't help but grin, because she knew what Casey was going to say next.

  
"I DIDN'T PUSH YOU!"

  
Casey threw her arm, pointing toward Izzie, loosing her balance in the process.

  
"Yeah, maybe you didn't."

  
This made Casey smile because she finally admitted it.

  
"Thanks for the ride Nate, Good Night Izzie!"

  
Casey stared with a slight grin directly at Izzie for a few seconds longer than a normal person would, and it made Izzie stomach flip a few times.

  
"Good-Night Newton"

  
Izzie smiled to herself as she rolled the window back up. She just realized that the name had come out of her mouth with a hint on endearment instead of hostility.

  
After dropping Casey off, the couple started making their way towards Izzie's. It was weird that their neighborhoods were not that far apart, yet, they never crossed paths before. Or maybe they did and just didn't realize.

  
Nate pulled into a parking lot by a nearby playground. It was clear he wasn't ready to drop Izzie off.

  
"So how was your night?"

  
"It was fine, I'm just so sleepy now. Time for bed"

  
Izzie was dozing off, in between sentences.

  
"Ohh Come on. You can hang out and get drunk with Casey, but you wont hang out with me? Its not even that late!"

  
Izzie didn't respond, she was just ready to go home. Nate moved closer to her, and leaned his head in to kiss her.

  
"No, Nate, I'm not in the mood."

  
"You are never in the mood, until you are"

  
It was true, that Izzie was never really a fan of sex. It wasn't something she necessarily wanted, but when Nate wanted to, she usually caved. It wasn't that she didn't want to do, it was that she just didn't really enjoy or get any sort of pleasure out of it. Nate kept on kissing her.

  
"NATE! STOP!! I said I'm not in the mood!"

  
Nate immediately backed off. He got the point. He turned and faced the steering wheel, turning the car on in the process.

  
"I think ill just walk from here."

  
She wanted to just leave this situation, and get home to her nice warm bed.

  
"You're nuts. Its cold out there! I know you want to go home, and i am the fastest way for you to get there.

  
Nate had a point. They pulled up to the small house, Nate didn't even try to kiss her as she exited the car. It wasn't until she got inside that she noticed the missed calls on her phone.

  
_Shit._

  
She called back, trying to sober up so her grandma wouldn't hear it in her voice. The other end answered, and Izzie didn't even have time to say hello before her grandma started in on her.

  
"Where have you been young lady? I have been worried sick! Your brother and sister are here, after i had to go pick them up from the Boys and Girls Club."

  
She was angry, and rightfully so. It was Izzie's responsibility to make sure the kids got home safe, and she failed at that.

  
"I'm sorry grandma, I got detention, and i just lost track of time."

  
Her grandma couldn't help but laugh.

  
"Who looses track of time when they are in detention?"

  
"Me i guess."

  
"Well next time your detention involves alcohol, be sure to let me know so i can plan for the evening."

  
Izzie didn't know how to respond.

  
"This isn't my first rodeo, young lady. I caught your mom drinking all the time. And if i had any authority to ground you, i would. Ill keep the kids tonight. Get some rest."

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
The weekend flew by, and for Izzie was actually looking forward to school on Monday and getting to catch up with Casey. She didn't want to be the one to text Casey first, so her phone laid silent minus the endless texts and phone calls from Nate. She had already forgiven him for the other night, but he still persisted on apologizing every other hour. Honestly, it was a bit much.

  
Sunday afternoon came around, and Izzie and her siblings arrived at the house to find her mom....and her ex-boyfriend, Steve. Izzie knew this wasn't going to end well. He's the one that got her mom hooked on most of the stuff shes on in the first place. He was bad news for everyone. She needed to nip this in the butt now.

  
"Mom, can I talk to you in the other room?"

  
Steve took a few steps toward her.

  
"Oh what? You cant talk in front of me? You talking shit already girl?"

  
_Already? Does this man plan on staying here?_

  
Izzie backed up until her back hit the wall. She had to bite her tongue instead of saying something that would upset him. Instead she looked to her mother.

  
"Mom. Please."

  
Her mom looked at Steve to calm him down.

  
"We will only be a few minutes"

  
They went into Izzie's room, and she shut the door behind her.

  
"What the hell is going on? Why is he here?"

  
She was already starting to tear up.

  
"Well honey, Steve is going to be staying with us for a while. You see, he lost his apartment and-"

  
"Us? Staying with us? You are only here when its convenient. Who knows where are the rest of the time. This house isn't an us situation that involves you. There is no us."

  
She was full on crying now. She just wished her mother could see what she was doing to this family, to her own children.

  
"Don't you remember what happened the last time? You really want to go through that again? To put us all through that again?"

  
Steve was an alcoholic, among many other things. The last time he was staying there, he punched a hole through the window, after her mom and locked him out during a fight. Her mom took him back, and Izzie had to clean up the blood pooled on the floor from his hand, and all the tiny pieces of glass that had flown across the room. It was Steve who eventually ended the relationship. He moved out and into the next poor girl to cross paths with him. Izzie's mom was heartbroken. She didn't leave her room for a weeks.

  
"I'm sorry honey, what do you want me to do? Leave him on the streets? You know i cant do that. He needs me, and we need him."

  
"I don't need him for anything! The only thing i need him to do is leave!"

  
Izzie had now graduated to full hysterics. she was sobbing on the floor next to her bed. Her mother looked down at her.

  
"Well that's not going to happen. This is my house, and what i say goes."

  
Izzie's mom went in for a hug, as if it were going to make up for all of this.

  
"You ready to go back out there?"

  
"No, i think I'm just going to go to bed."

  
"Well alright honey, if that's what you want."

  
Her mom got up to leave.

  
"Hey mom...The kids haven't eaten. I hope you can figure out a way to make them dinner like a real mother."

  
She knew she had crossed a line, but she didn't regret saying it. Her mother needed to hear how she looked, and to see how much Izzie had to be responsible for. Her mom walked out making sure to close the door behind her. Izzie's crying continued as she reached for her phone. She scrolled past her previous conversations with Nate, to Casey.

  
**Hey Newton**

  
Casey didn't answer. She wanted desperately to talk to her, she needed to talk to her, but she didn't want to come across as such. Instead Izzie fell asleep with her phone in her hand waiting for it to vibrate with a reply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always if you like it let me know!!!!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode 5. Its time for Pizza!

Izzie spent most of Monday looking for Casey. She didn't have much time in between classes. At the end of the day, she decided to go straight to her locker. Once she caught a glimpse of Casey, Izzie picked up speed and forced her way through the crowd.

  
"There you are. I need you."

  
Izzie was confused that the person she needed the most right now was Casey and not Nate. But she didn't fight it.

  
"My mom's loser ex-boyfriend just moved back in. Where've you been?"

  
"Life stuff, dude. You don't want to know."

  
Izzie was concerned but could tell that Casey didn't want to talk about. So she obliged, and gladly applied her lop gloss using the reflection of her phone.

  
"Gotta love a guy who brings only the clothes on his back and a trash bag full of drug paraphernalia."

  
Casey leaned on her locker as she shut it and Izzie now stood directly in front of her. She handed Casey her lip gloss. She drew a smiley on her hand and looked Izzie in the eye and stuck her tongue out. Izzie loved when Casey looked at her that way. It made all her problems just slip away.

  
"What's up with you?"

  
They haven't talked all weekend, and they had a lot to catch up on.

"Well, we thought my dad had a heart attack. Turns out it was just a panic attack caused by my mom being a tramp."

  
_Well, that would explain why she didn't answer. At least she wasn't ignoring me._

She walked up to Casey putting her hands on either shoulder and pushing her a bit closer to the locker.

  
"It's a freaking miracle the two of us are still alive."

  
"I know."

  
Her hands felt like fire in that moment, and she quickly backed away. She turned slightly to see Nate walking toward them.

  
"I knew you two were going to fall in love."

  
Both girls didn't even care to respond, and Izzie looked to Casey trying not to laugh...Or look into her eyes, so she quickly looked back at Nate.

  
"Hey, if you guys ever hook up, don't forget to include me."

  
"Yeah, okay"

  
Izzie turned on her heels, seeing Newton both flipping Nate her middle finger and putting her opposite arm around Izzie's shoulder. Izzie felt that electric feeling again, but didn't want to move an inch away from Casey. The two walked to track practice in each others arms.

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie met Nate in the lounge area for lunch. She had been putting him on the back burner since her night with Casey, and even more so now that they were back at school. They sat hand in hand, on the small blue couch on by the wall of the room. She was glad she got to spend some time with Nate, but she would be lying if she said she was disappointed to see Casey walk in the door.

  
"I'm still starving."

  
Newton walked up to the couch and plopped her backpack on the coffee table in front of the couple.

  
"Frankie talked me into ordering the quinoa bowl. I feel like I just ate two pounds of air."

  
"Should have ordered pizza."

  
Nate gently caressed her hand. Izzie was glad Casey and Nate got along so well. She would have hated to hated to have to choose between them.

  
"Dude, the pizza here tastes like a stale cracker with ketchup on it."

  
_Rude_

  
"Wow, I think we finally found something Newton's a snob about."

  
"I'm spoiled. Our pizza place, Don's, is the best."

  
Izzie had heard of Don's but never went. The only time she really went out to eat was with Nate, and he wouldn't drive towns away from his house just to get some pizza with her.

  
"Then maybe we should go there."

  
Izzie had found that the more time she spent with Casey the more she allowed herself to act on her impulses. And her impulses wanted bread sticks"

  
"What now?"

Casey seemed panicked.

"Get a chance to try out Webster."

If Casey loved this place, then it was something that Izzie wanted to experience. She looked at Nate to see if he was on board, despite Casey's hesitation.

  
"No."

  
"Yeah."

  
"We shouldn't."

  
Izzie wasn't going to let Casey say no to this.

  
"Friday after practice. I'll tell the team."

  
"Well, Friday it gets a little crowded 'cause there's, like, a lot of families. So maybe like another time, or never?"

  
She was digging really deep for excuses and it wasn't working. Finally Nate jumped on board.

  
"No, Friday works."

  
"Yeah. Friday works."

  
"We're excited to see where Newton comes from."

  
For once Nate was thinking the same thing she was.

  
"Ooh! It'll be fun. Or sad. Either way, I'm getting bread sticks."

  
Izzie grabbed her backpack and walked away before Casey could argue it anymore. As she walked out the door and into the hall she heard Casey yell after her.

  
"I once saw a rat there!!!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie arrived home that evening to her mom, Steve and the kids all eating Mcdonald's. Izzie just shook her head and went to her room. She wasn't even a legal adult yet, and she would cook actual meals. She was genuinely excited for Friday. She had already called her grandma about watching her siblings in case her mom was...indisposed. Suddenly her phone was vibrating like crazy. She reached across the bed onto the nightstand and found Nate had started a group message with her, Casey and Quinn.

  
**Nate: Cant wait to Nom Papa Don's**

  
He followed this with an excessive amount of pizza emojis.

  
**Quinn: Does Dons have GF crust?**

  
**Newton: No it's extra bready. Lets go somewhere else.**

  
Izzie laughed, Casey was really going to fight this all week. Her phone vibrated again.

  
**Newton: So is it okay is Evan comes?**

  
_Right, Evan....Hes a thing._ Izzie was very curious to meet Casey's boyfriend. But she couldn't help the doubt that filled her mind. _Was she only going because Evan would come?_ Regardless she responded to Casey the fastest.

  
**Of course Newton!! Cant wait to meet him!**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
  
The track team plus Nate where all seated at a center table at Dons. Friday night had finally arrived, and Izzie finally got to have her bread sticks. Not long after they got there, a tall boy with bleach blonde hair cautiously walked up to the table

  
"Hi."

  
"Hey."

  
Casey quickly jumped up to great the blonde haired boy. She couldn't help but notice that Casey went in for a hug, and Evan went in for a kiss.

  
"Newton, is this him?"

  
"Yeah, this is Evan."

  
"Evan, this is everybody."

  
"Hey, everybody."

  
"Welcome."

  
It felt weird to welcome Evan to a place Izzie was sure he came to frequently. She was torn about Evan. She equally didn't want to know about him, and wanted to know everything that Casey seemed to love about him. Evan pulled Casey aside, and Izzie's attention went back to their prior conversation.

  
"Anyways, I cant believe someone stole the vodka out of your locker!"

  
The food finally came and it was as good as Casey said it would be. It felt nice to have everyone there and bonding, even Nate and Evan. Suddenly Nate started speak in fluent Italian.

  
"Mi chiamo Don e faccio un grande penne!"

  
Everyone couldn't help but laugh at the fact that Nate speaking Italian suddenly made him some sort of pizza connoisseur. Izzie heard newton, lean over to Evan.

  
"Aren't they the best?"

  
"Yeah"

  
It was short, and not very convincing. Izzie started to worry a bit. She had been glad that Casey and Nate got along, but she didn't even thing about if Evan didn't like her. What would Casey do if she had to choose? But Nate didn't seem to notice.

  
"Especially me. Hey, you know that I was her first friend at Clayton?"

  
This jabbed at Izzie. Was Nate saying that to make Evan jealous?

  
"Oh, really? I thought that Izzie was."

  
_Had she not told Evan all the things that happened?_

  
"No. No, I was wicked mean to her."

  
Izzie looked at Casey, almost reminiscing on Izzies horrible behavior. She had gotten more and more comfortable look Casey in the eye, and was able to repress some of the weird butterflies in her stomach when Casey looked back.

  
"You were so mean to me."

  
Casey smiled, and Izzie was endlessly grateful that she had been forgiven by the taller girl.

  
"I know."

  
Izzie once again acted on her impulses and patted her hand on Casey's leg.

  
"I'm sorry about that, but I'm so nice now."

  
She quickly realized what she was doing and removed her hand an awkwardly grabbed another slice of pizza. She looked in Evans direction and before taking a bite she asked.

  
"So, how's Newton without Newton?"

  
"Oh, Newton I don't know, I don't go to Newton. I actually go to the technical school."

  
Izzie had known uncles that went to the technical school. They all had good jobs right out of high school and no student loan debts. Before she had a chance to respond Casey spoke up.

  
"But he's really smart."

  
Izzie could sense the awkwardness in the air, and she wasn't quite sure how to fix it. So she settled on.

  
"We'll take your word for it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for everyone reading and giving kudos and comments!!! It means the world to me!!
> 
> I will be trying to post every weekend but this is a bit of a short chapter so I will probably add another one mid week!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We see how Casey gets home from Dons, and just how awful Steve can be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING  
> This chapter has a lot of swearing and descriptions of domestic violence.

Izzie and Nate were at a stop light a few blocks away from Don's when her phone went off.

  
**Newton: Come back and get me and i will love you forever.**

  
"Turn Around Nate, Newton needs us!"

  
Izzie hoped that wasn't true, that Casey needed both of them. She mostly wanted Casey to need her. They pulled into Don's parking lot and found Casey sitting on the sidewalk. She quietly got into the car and avoided eye contact with Izzie.

  
"You wanna talk about it Newton?"

  
"Nothing really to talk about. My boyfriend just thinks I've changed and now hates everything about me."

  
Casey started to cry, and Izzie unbuckled and climbed into the backseat with Casey. She took the taller girl in her arms, and allowed Casey to lean into Izzie's supportive embrace.

  
"Umm watch the leather."

  
Clearly Nate was more concerned with the car than anyone else. Huge surprise there. She decided to try and go with a laughing solution to dry Casey's tears. Izzie hated seeing her upset.

  
"Newton, Evan doesn't hate you! If anything he hates us!"

Casey pulled her head back so she could look at Izzie.

  
"Wait. You noticed that?"

  
They were pulling up to Casey's house when panic erupted in Izzie. She had only been joking.

_Evan seriously didn't like them. He didn't like her. Casey was going to have to choose._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie could hear the yelling from the the driveway as she quietly shut the passengers door to Nate's car. He pretended he didn't hear, as he waved good bye, and quickly backed out into the street. Izzie was glad he didn't press the issue. Steve was not a topic we wanted to discuss. She had called the cops on him once, and her mother sent them away and grounded her for a month. "Don't Call the Cops" became a rule in the house. One she still followed to this day. She gripped her backpack strap a bit tighter in her hand, torn on weather or not to actually go inside, or not. But then she heard the crying.

  
_That Son Of A Bitch_

  
Izzie ran inside, nearly breaking the glass on the front door in the process. Once inside she saw Steve, his face about an inch away from her mothers.

  
"YOU MUST WANT ME TO ACT LIKE THIS OR YOU WOULDN'T DO STUPID SHIT TO PISS ME OFF ALL THE TIME"

  
Even from all the way across the room, Izzie could smell the alcohol on his breath, and could see the tears running down her mother's cheek. Neither of them had noticed her, so she quickly followed the sounds of children wailing into her siblings room. There she found Mike, and Gwen both half holding her baby sister, all three of them in tears. Izzie knelt down in front of them and whispered.

  
"Everything is going to be alright, I promise."

  
She took her Ipod out of her backpack, and put a earbud into both siblings ears. She scrolled through her songs until she found the perfect song, the only song to help them in this situation. When Izzie was younger, and her mother and Steve would fight she would listen to "The Devil Went Down To Georgia" over and over until the yelling stopped. She didn't know why, but that was her song to make all the madness go away. Both siblings gave her a confused look at her song choice, but she just smiled.

  
"Stay tight, i will be right back I promise."

  
Izzie quietly tip-toed her way down the narrow hallway, until she was back on the edge of the living room. The screaming had only gotten worse. As the two adults came into view Izzie saw her mom running away from Steve, as he picked up a trophy from a nearby shelf and threw it towards her. The glass trophy hit the wall shattering into a thousand tiny pieces. It was Izzie's state championship trophy. Her life's greatest accomplishment...gone forever. She knelt down to pick up what was left.

  
"Izzie, what are you doing?"

Her mother and finally noticed her, and this meant Steve did as well.

  
"Yeah you little bitch? what the hell do you think you are doing? Leave, go in the other room, this is between me and your slut of a mother."

  
Izzie snapped.

  
"YOU WANT ME TO LEAVE? DUDE YOU LEAVE! THIS ISN'T YOUR HOUSE, THIS ISN'T YOUR DOMAIN. YOU ARE A HURRICANE, YOU DESTROY EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH, AND I WONT LET YOU DESTROY MY FAMILY MORE THAN YOU ALREADY HAVE."

  
She knew what she was saying would have dire consequences, but she just kept going.

  
"GO DO YOUR PRECIOUS DRUGS SOMEWHERE ELSE, GO LIVE ON THE STREET FOR ALL I CARE. BUT IF YOU ARE HERE THEN WE WONT BE!"

  
Steve lunged.

  
Izzie took a step back and avoided his drunken stumble, she ran into her room and locked the door behind her. She jumped over the bed, and sat with her back towards the door. Using it as protection as if she were a solider in a bunker.She heard pounding and felt the room shake with every wicked hit.

  
"Open this door, Ill break it down if i have to!"

  
"Steven please! Please just stop. Let me talk to her!"

  
Izzie heard more yelling, and then everything stopped. silence at last. Izzie heard a soft tap at the door.

 

"Izzie, its me, please let me in."

  
Izzie quickly but cautiously unlocked the door. She opened it just enough for her mother to enter the room, then she shut and locked it again. She didn't trust Steve not to burst through the door, but honestly, she didn't trust her mother either.

  
"I think you should go honey. Just for the night, take the kids."

  
Izzie was in shock. Her mom was taking his side. After everything, she was choosing him.

  
"But Mom Wha-"

  
"No, buts young lady. This is for the best. He will be calmed down in the morning. Take the car and go. "

  
Izzie's mother leaned in, and gave her daughter a quick kiss on her forehead before standing up, and walking out without saying another word.   
How could this be happening? How could she be the one told to leave? How could her mother, her own flesh and blood take the side of this man from off the streets? Izzie quickly wiped away the tears from her eyes, and went to get her younger siblings. She knew she had to leave soon as she still heard yelling from the bedroom. As she walked out the door she realized that just because she wasn't there that the fighting would stop. Her mom would continue to suffer long into the night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie pulled up to her grandma's house, she managed to maintain her composure thus far. As she put the old beat up car in park, the kids practically jumped out of their seats and to the front door. Izzie followed behind with the baby in her arms., and met her grandmas eyes as she opened the door. She didn't even have to say a word for her grandma to know what had just occurred. She ushered the children inside.

  
"Who wants hot chocolate?"

  
A cheerful "Me!" erupted from the small children. As Izzie's grandma took the youngest infant into her arms she continued to stand in the door way.

 

"You best get in here too."

  
Izzie's grandma made a mean hot cocoa, but she was in no mood to talk about what happened and hoped her grandma would accept that. She took out her phone while her grandma delivered the warm beverage to the kids at the table.

  
**Hey Newton! Long time no see!**

  
**Newton: lol it has only been a few hours, but i have to admit it feels like days.**

  
**Tell me about it. So um if you weren't busy, i was wondering if i could maybe come over for a little bit. I just need a distraction from life.**

  
**Newton: Of course!!! Nate Problems?**

  
**Steve Problems.**

  
**Newton: Say no more! Get your butt over here!**

  
After Texting Casey, Izzie realized that she had an unread text from Nate.

**Nate: Hey good lookin' hows your night going? You wanna come over for a bit?**

  
**I'm actually on my way to Casey's.**

  
**Nate:Aweee you two are having a slumber party without me?**

  
Izzie didn't know why Nate had to make everything about him, and was annoyed he did.

  
**I mean... i guess you can come too.**

  
**Nate: I'm on my way!**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you are liking it!! as always let me know!!! I will be posting again this weekend! 
> 
> Fun Fact: The Devil Went Down To Georgia was my go to song to blast when my parents were fighting.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Based on Episode 6 AKA the episode when magic really starts to happen!

Izzie thanked her grandma for everything and walked out to the car. As she buckled in, her phone vibrated in her back pocket.

  
**Newton: BTW you don't have to ask to come over. You are welcome here anytime! Now hurry up! I have a book to read to cheer you up!"**

  
Suddenly, all her emotions from the day came to the surface. One tear fell down her cheek, then another and another until crying was all she was able to do. Her mom choose that....ass over her. Her own mother, how was anyone truly supposed to love or care about her when her own mother didn't. After 5 mins she forced herself to stop, well to at least not cry as much. Instead she focused on one task. To get to Casey.

  
Izzie was awful with directions, even with google maps she never had an easy time finding the actual house number, especially at night. Finally she found the correct house and pulled in the drive.

  
**I'm Here**

  
**Newton: I'm coming for you!**

  
Izzie slowly made her way to the front door, but Casey still wasn't there. She decided to knock softly. As she wiped away the tears from her eyes, the front door opened, and there stood Casey. After all that Izzie has been through, and how upset she was, she couldn't help but smile at the site of Casey. She ran into her arms and hugged her. She let herself cry as she buried her head into Casey. This is exactly where she wanted to be right now.

  
The two girls made their way to the couch.

  
"Do you....do you want to talk about it?"

  
"Not really no. Well yes, but-"

  
Casey put her hand on Izzie's knee and she snapped back to reality. Her mind was finally processing everything that happened. Izzie had arrived at the stage of anger. Steve made her angry than anyone. But she was proud she stood her ground.

  
"He's such a dick! He was yelling and throwing things and I was like, "Dude, leave!" But whatever. I'm not scared of that asshole"

 

She failed to point out that he was yelling at her, and that he threw her trophy. She didn't want Casey to worry any more than she already looked to be.

  
"What about the kids?"

  
"I took them to my grandma's. But she doesn't have a lot of room, so-"

  
It had just occurred to Izzie that she didn't even ask to stay at Casey's. She had no solid place to stay the night other than in the back seat of her mom's car.

  
"Oh, you're staying here."

  
_Oh thank God._

  
"Okay. Thank you."

  
Izzie didn't think she could handle leaving Casey tonight. Just as Izzie realized that Casey's hand was on her right shoulder, the front door unlocked and opened. Izzie still a bit jumpy, turned to see what was happening. A boy walked in as if he was on a mission sent from God himself. He was shorter than Casey, with perfectly cut hair, and head phones around his neck. Izzie knew exactly who is was.

  
"Sam, this is Izzie. Izzie, this is Sam."

  
Izzie waved at Sam, not wanting to talk to him if it would make i'm uncomfortable. Izzie knew Sam was autistic, but she also knew no person with autism behaves the same. She figured it would be best to let Sam come to her in his own time.

  
"No time. I'm busy."

  
Izzie chuckled to herself as Sam ran up stairs, skipping steps as he went. She turned to Casey who was smiling too.

  
"Seems like he likes you."

  
The two girl exchanged a quick look and words were not needed. They both jumped off the couch, and ran up the stairs to see just what Sam was up to. They approached the door, and Casey opened it and walked in without even knocking. Izzie was in awe of Sam's room. It was perfectly organized, and no matter where she looked, she saw penguins.

  
"What are you doing?"

  
"I'm packing my things."

  
"Why? You don't go places."

  
"I'm going to sleep over at Zahid's to learn how to do it, for when I go to the senior lock-in, and college, and eventually Bonetown."

  
Izzie let a small smirk escape. _Bonetown....he is hilarious. It must run in the family._

  
"You know, that actually sounds like a not-terrible idea."

  
"I thought so too. I think I have everything. Edison. Should I bring Edison?"

  
" No, leave the turtle."

  
"Tortoise."

  
Izzie was surprised. Both by the fact that she and Sam responded the same way, at the exact same time, but more because Casey couldn't tell the clear differences of a turtle and a tortoise."

  
"Nerds."

  
Izzie rolled her eyes slightly at Casey's remark, but a part of her loved the playful teasing coming from Casey.

  
"But I need Edison. What if I can't sleep without the sounds of his little feet on the glass, or the smell of his food wafting through the tank vent?"

   
Sam was talking himself out of of his first sleepover.

  
"Maybe this is a bad idea. Maybe I shouldn't go."

  
"Sam-"

  
"Why don't you leave Edison here, where he's comfortable? But bring his container of food, so that way if you miss him or you feel nervous you can just smell it."

  
Izzie remembered spending a lot of time at her grandmas as a kid. So much that it felt like her real home. Her grandma always had a candles in her house. The scents to match the season. Izzie couldn't fall asleep without those smells. One day she expressed her troubles to her grandma, and from that day on, when her grandma went to buy candles, she would buy it's twin for Izzie to take home.

  
"Olfactory senses are the greatest memory stimulant of all the senses."

  
_Well that explains it._

  
"That's not a bad idea."

  
Izzie beamed with pride.

  
"Your name is Izzie?"

  
"Yeah."

  
And with that, Sam went right back to focusing on the task at hand. Izzie liked Sam. She liked how his mind worked. She liked how Casey interacted with him, and she liked how he interacted with her.

  
_Casey was right, I think he does like me!_

  
"Hm. Well, that's everything."

  
Sam zipped up his backpack

  
"You'll be okay without me?"

  
"Yes, I'm sure I'll manage."

  
Casey looked like a proud mother watching her child go off to kindergarten. Izzie wasn't oblivious as to what a big deal this was. She was proud for Sam too. They stood in his bedroom doorway watching him leave.

  
"I'm glad you like Sam."

  
"What's not to like? He's cool."

  
She meant it. There was a lot of people who have come and gone in Izzie's life that she pretended to like to be polite or because her mom asked her to, Steve included. But she genuinely liked Sam. She looked down the hall way to see another door.

  
"Is this your room?"

  
Casey passed Izzie walking into the room.

  
"This is were the magic happens!"

  
Izzie laughed as she remained on the edge of the room. She looked around, just talking it all in. She didn't want to overlook an inch. The walls were light blue, and there were posters and track ribbons on the walls. There were trophies, on the dresser, in no particular order or display. She thought of her trophy, shattered on the floor. Casey sat down on the bed, and Izzies eyes followed. It was a queen sized bed, with the metal head board with lights wrapped around it. There were two night stands on either side of the bed both with their own lamp.

  
_Paradise._

  
Izzie joined Casey on the bed. Nothing looked better than that bed right now. She had a rough day. She was exhausted but she wanted to spend as much time with Casey as possible.

 

"So about that book you wanted to read to me?"

  
A smile came across Casey's face.

  
"Well, first...I have an idea!"

  
She grabbed Izzie and led her down stairs. She didn't know what was in store, but she trusted Casey.

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Casey and Izzie laid side by side in a newly constructed blanket fort. The various blankets sprawled over the couch and perfectly arranged chairs from the dining room table. The lights were off, but there was a lantern to light the fort. Izzie laid staring at the blanket ceiling twirling a strand hair. Her arm leaned gently on Casey's while the taller girl sat up, with a flashlight in hand, reading seriously from Steven King's "IT"

  
"And this was so exquisitely stupid, he didn't dare tell anyone that while he was feeling for the light switch, some horrible, clawed paw - would settle lightly over his wrist- "

  
Izzie covered her eyes with her hands, and leaned fully into Casey. Who would have thought a book could be so scary?

  
"Okay, stop. I can't do it. No, keep reading."

  
Casey slammed the book shut and tossed it to the side.

  
"No, I'm stopping. It's too scary."

  
The pair of girls erupted in laughter. Casey set the flashlight down, and laid down next to the shorter girl. In that moment, with Casey laying there, Izzie didn't know what to do with her hands. She settled on pulling her sweatshirt sleeves to cover the hands up. She allowed her self to lean towards Casey, and felt the other girls arm touching hers. This was exactly what Izzie needed. She felt safe in the fort with Casey. She would feel safe with Casey anywhere.

  
"Thank you for building this ridiculous fort, and reading me scary books just to keep my mind off of what's going on."

  
"Yeah.We can stay in here forever if you want."

  
Izzie bit her bottom lip.

  
"We can pee in the can, do college classes online."

  
Izzie laughed, but she agreed with everything Casey was saying.

  
"We can you know, get old here and get a couple cats."

  
That sounds perfect. I would stay where ever with you.

  
Izzie couldn't remember how she functioned before she was friends with Casey, and she couldn't imagine her future without her in it. She looked towards Casey. Maybe it was because Casey wasn't making eye contact but, Izzie decided to be impulsive, though she wasn't surprised since Casey seemed to bring that out of her.

  
"Newton?"

  
"Yeah."

  
"This might sound lame, but you're, like, my new favorite person."

  
_I really just said that. Shes going to think I'm crazy. this was such a bad idea._

  
"Really?"

  
"Yeah."

  
The two girls still hadn't allowed their eyes to meet.

  
"Is that tragic since we just met a little while ago?"

  
Finally, Casey looked toward Izzie who was already staring back.

  
"No. You're my new favorite person, too."

  
Izzie was beyond ecstatic. She looked away slightly to allow herself to fully smile. She had found her person, and it seemed as though Casey had found the same in her. Suddenly Casey took a more serious tone.

  
"But don't tell Sharice 'cause she will kill you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
In the past hour, the two girls had constructed and perfected a very elaborate handshake. Izzie's night had turned around completely and she owed it all to Casey. The girls sat cross legged, facing in each other. As they finished their handshake a loud knock echoed through the living room. They both froze, looking at each other.

  
"It's Pennywise."

  
Izzie put her hand over her mouth. Instantly hating herself what she realized was happening.

  
"No. I forgot I texted Nate."

  
Technically Nate texted her, and technically she did invite him. But she didn't actually mean it, and she certainly didn't think he would drive all the way over to Casey's.

  
"No."

  
"Yeah, I know, I'm sorry."

  
"He's going to ruin the girl time."

  
Izzie agreed, Nate was ruining their girls night. It wasn't supposed to be like this. It was supposed to just be them. She wanted him to go back home, and leave them in peace.

  
"Let's pretend we're not here."

  
Casey paused for a moment, before erupting in a voice deeper than usual.

  
"We're not home."

  
Nate heard her loud and clear.

  
"Open the door, you dummies."

  
The girls laughed, but Izzie instantly became self-conscious. Even though Nate was her boyfriend, he was still someone who Izzie felt she couldn't fully be herself with.

  
"He's gonna make so much fun of us for making this fort."

  
"Well, boys ruin everything."

  
She was right. Although Casey turned her horrible night around, Izzie couldn't help but feel like Nate ruined what was salvaged. She looked to Casey.

  
"Okay, what do we do?"

  
"Invite him in, I guess."

  
Izzie hadn't told Nate about anything that had happened and she really didn't want it to get brought up. She knew the perfect thing for the 3 of them to do that wouldn't involve talking too much.

  
"We can watch a movie."

  
"You'll fall asleep."

  
_Yeah i might._

  
"No, I won't."

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie and Casey sat on opposite sides of the couch with Nate in the middle. Izzie hated being so far away from Casey when she was just so close. She tried focusing on the horror movie on the TV, but the more to focused, the heavier her eye lids became. Casey was right. Izzie fell asleep.

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie was awoken to Casey softly shaking her shoulder.

  
"Iz. Hey Izzie. Lets go up to bed."

  
Izzie groggily agreed, and slowly rose, and walked up the stairs to Casey's room. Casey went into the bathroom to change, and Izzie took her sweatshirt off to reveal her tank top. She slipped into a pair of shorts Casey had left out for her. She slowly got into bed, and made herself cozy underneath the blankets. Casey's bed was just as comfortable as she imagined it would be. A few minutes later Casey emerged from the bathroom and joined her in bed. As Casey lay on her back, Izzie moved to her side, facing the beds rightful owner. Izzie remembered how hard it used to be to fall asleep without the scent of her grandmas candles. But now she couldn't think of anything more soothing to fall asleep to than the smell of Casey's sheets.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So many great scenes in this episode. Ugh I hope I did it justice!!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I think we all know the drama that is about to occur.

Izzie awoke to the sound of her phone vibrating. She opened her eyes and looked around the room, realizing where she was. She looked at her phone: 8:38am. She rolled onto her opposite side expecting to see a sleeping Casey, but instead found an empty other half of the bed. Izzie had slept like a rock last night. It was honestly the best sleep she had got in a while, especially since Steve had been back. She heard quiet footsteps approaching the room. The door slowly opened, and Casey tip-toed her way inside before she saw that the shorter girl was already awake. The two exchanged groggy good mornings as Casey joined Izzie on the bed. She looked like she hadn't slept at all.

  
_Did I toss and turn too much? Oh God, I bet I kept her up all night._

  
The more izzie watched Casey the more distraught she realized she was.

  
"Newton....Are you okay?"

  
Casey snapped out of the small trance she was in, and smiled at Izzie.

  
"Uh yeah, I'm just tired."

  
Izzie didn't believe the taller girl. She was clearly tired, but she could tell there was something else upsetting her. Izzie tilted her head, and decided she was going to stare at Casey until she told her what was going on.

  
"No, Actually....There is something."

  
Casey took on a more serious demeanor, almost as if she were terrified of the words lingering on her tongue.

  
"Last night...."

  
There was a pause in Casey's sentence and the anticipation was becoming too much for Izzie to handle.

  
"Sam almost got arrested, last night"

  
"WHAT?! What the hell happened?"

  
"Well apparently he left Zahid's in the middle of the night, and got stopped by an officer. Sam flicks a rubber band and recited names of penguins when he gets nervous. The officer thought he was on drugs."

  
"Shouldn't the police be the ones to know the difference between autism and drugs?"

  
"Yeah...You would think."

  
Although the girls hadn't known each other long, Izzie could read Casey like a book. She could tell the taller girl was still very upset.

  
"Well, I should go, you should spend some time with Sam, and your parents."

  
Casey looked conflicted, but agreed fairly quickly.

  
"But are you going to be okay going home?"

  
"Have you met me? Of course i'll be okay!"

  
Both of the girls arms widened as they embraced in a very short hug.

  
"Thanks Newton. For everything. You're amazing!"

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie hid in her room for the remainder of the weekend. She realized that if she ignored Steve, he would do the same. For as much as she hated him being there, she would gladly take the peace and quiet of obvious avoidance than the fighting. The two girls hadn't really talked the rest of the weekend so she was ecstatic to round the corner to her locker Monday morning, to find Casey putting something in the slit in her locker.

  
"Did you write me a love note?"

  
Casey quickly jerked back away from the locker putting the folded piece of paper behind her back. She smiled, but Izzie could see the surprise in Casey's eyes.

"Oh, hey, Izz."

  
Izzie couldn't help but smile. Casey had been thinking of her enough to write her something, and she had caught her right in the act. The only problem was Izzie didn't even have a guess as to what it could be about.

  
"What is that?"

  
Casey clearly didn't want to be around when Izzie read this. The possibilities multiplied and raced through Izzie's brain.

  
"You know, maybe later."

  
"Let me see it."

  
"No. It's not anything."

  
"Give it."

  
Izzie reached out in an effort to grab the note out of Casey's hand.

  
"It's nothing, really."

  
"I want to read nothing."

  
"I love nothing. Nothing's my favorite."

  
Izzie laughed as the two girls were aggressively holding hands with the note in between them. She finally broke free with the paper in hand.

  
"I was going to tell you in person, but I chickened out."

  
Izzie unfolded the paper.

  
"So I wrote it."

  
She began to read and the smile that had been beaming from her face disappeared entirely.

  
"Obviously."

**Dear Izzie,**

  
**I wanted to tell you the other morning, but I was too scared. When you fell asleep at my house, Nate kissed me. But I pushed him away and told him to leave, and I promise, that I didn't want to kiss him at all. I just thought you should know.**

  
**I'm sorry. Call Me.**

  
**Love Newton**

  
Izzies heart felt like it was breaking into a million pieces. Her stomach felt like it was being punched over and over again.

  
"You and Nate kissed?"

  
"No, he kissed me."

  
Casey pointed to the paper while saying that, backing up her words with written evidence.

  
"That asshole."

  
"I know."

  
_How could Nate do this? How could he kiss another girl? How could he kiss Casey? He knew how important Casey was to her. How could he do this?_

  
"I can't believe he did that. I'm going to kill him."

  
"Do you want to go talk about it? "

  
Casey seemed genuinely concerned and Izzie loved her for it, but the damage was done.

  
"Nope. I just need time to think."

  
Izzie folded up the paper, and began to walk away.

  
"Sorry, I'm not good at this."

  
"Yeah."

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
**WE NEED TO TALK....NOW**

  
Izzie hadn't given Nate much of a choice in regard to when and where they were meeting, or even what it was about. But then again, he should have known she was going to find out. Nate walking into the common room towards the couch Izzie was already sitting on. He dropped his backpack on the floor, and leaned in for a kiss as he sat. Izzie moved her head in the opposite direction to avoid the kiss at all costs.

  
"Izzie....Is everything okay?"

  
"No Nate, nothing is okay right now. You kissed Casey."

  
"What? No I didn't."

  
Nate seemed nervous, and a simple denial wasn't going to end this conversation.

  
"Casey kissed me."

  
Izzie shook her head

  
"No. No that's not possible. She would never."

  
Her heart hurt more hearing those words, than when she had read that Nate initiated everything. She instantly began to cry.

  
"I'm sorry Iz. After you fell asleep the other night."

  
"No. No."

  
Izzie couldn't find the words.

  
"Why didn't you tell me?"

  
Nate stumbled on his words before they come out.

  
"I-I just didn't want to hurt you. I know how close you two had gotten. I guess I should have saw it coming. She kept flirting with me. This is all my fault Iz, I should have saw the signs."

  
Looking back there was always flirting. Casey would always joke about "pocket peanuts" with him. She must have been implying something else.

  
"Please. Please believe me Izzie."

  
Izzie's heart felt like it was in a vice. She wanted to believe Casey, but Nate made the most sense. Izzie didn't know what to do.

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
It was insane how much can change in a few hours. As Izzie rounded the corner to her locker, she once again saw Casey, this time sitting on a bench, clearly waiting. This time, Izzie felt her heart break a little more. She walked straight past the other girl not even looking her way.

  
"Hey. I've been looking for you."

  
Casey said it smiling. Acting as if nothing was wrong. Acting as if she didn't kiss her boyfriend a few days prior. Izzie continued on to her locker.

  
"I flicked a freshman in the ear, I thought it was you. I had to pretend it was hazing."

  
She hated Casey even more in the moment. Of course she would do something like that. Izzie had to fight back laughter. Thankfully her locker door blocked her face. Newton was still Newton, but she still betrayed her.

"Is everything okay?"

  
_No_

  
"Yep."

  
Izzie switched out her books for her next class and put them in her backpack. Still avoiding eye contact.

  
"Did you break up with Nate?"

  
"No."

  
"No?"

  
"That's what I said."

  
Izzie turned on her heels to walk away. Casey reacted and walked towards the shorter girl, putting her hand on her shoulder in attempts to stop her.

  
"Izzie, what's up?"

  
Izzie turned to face Casey, this time she made sure to make eye contact this time.

  
"I asked Nate about what happened. He said you kissed him."

  
"What? No, I That is not true."

  
Izzie could tell when Casey was lying, but she was being super convincing today. This confused her even more.

  
"I don't know what to believe."

  
"Believe me."

  
Casey was practically begging Izzie to take her side. The two girls had only known each other for a few months. She had known Nate for years. She owed it to him.

  
"I've known him longer....He's my boyfriend."

  
For some reason, being Nate's girlfriend didn't seem like a good enough reason to end this friendship.

  
"I've seen you guys flirt. I just thought you liked the attention."

  
The words burned as they left Izzie's mouth.

  
"Izzie, I didn't do anything."

  
Casey moved closer as Izzie moved further away.

  
"That's not what he said. So just back off, Casey."

  
Izzie turned to find Nate waiting for her. She walked into his arms and away from the girl who she had quickly allowed her self to depend on.

  
"Casey? What happened to "Newton"?"

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
" I can't believe she had the balls to do something like that."

  
"Yeah. You took her under your wing, and she hooks up with you boyfriend? What a Slut."

  
Izzie didn't want to talk about this anymore but the girls just kept on.

  
"I hope she doesn't think any of us want anything to do with her."

  
Quinn got up and walk towards Casey's locker. Casey must have forgotten to lock it, as Quinn quickly opened it and pulled out the black running shoes from inside. The remainder of the girls started to huddle around her. The sounds of giggles enticed Izzie to look at exactly what Quinn was doing. As she stood up, she saw Quinn writing the world "SLUT" on the sneaker with a white paint pen. Izzie went to grab the shoes.

  
"Stop, Quinn!"

  
Quinn quickly dodged Izzie's hands, and quickly wrote "HO" on the other one.

  
"See Iz, they are perfect!"

  
"That is far from perfect, why would you do that!?"

  
Izzie was clearly upset,  but that didn't mean the rest of the team got to take their frustrations out of Casey too. Especially not on her sneakers. She knew how much those meant to her. 

  
"I did it for you...Jeez."

"I don't need you to do anything for me. I'm a big girl, i can take care of myself."

  
Izzie began to walk out the door. She stopped and looked right at Quinn.

  
"Now unlike you, I'm here to actually run. Not just to pretend I'm into it so the guys will want to hook up with me"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you are liking it!! I am working on the last chapter now, so its almost complete!!!!
> 
> As always, if you like it, let me know!
> 
> Also my Tumblr is turnyourwoundsin2wisdom if you want to follow me on there as well!


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzie makes some life choices, and turns to someone she trusts for advice.

Izzie laid on Nate bed looking up at the ceiling. It had been a long day, and Izzie just wanted to sleep. She was in and out of slumber as Nate's arms wrapped around her. She had chosen Nate, but she couldn't stop thinking about Casey. She just didn't know if it was because she wasn't speaking to her. Izzie understood that her choosing Nate over Casey wasn't fair. After the smoke cleared Izzie realized that it didn't matter who kissed who. The just the thought of Nate kissing Casey sent Izzie into a rage. He knew what she meant to Izzie. Casey wasn't his to be kissing. All of these realizations made things even more complicated. She needed a break from everyone.

  
"I think i'm going to go."

  
Izzie removed Nate's arms from around her, as she stood to leave.

  
"I mean, if you really want to. Call me later?"

  
Izzie started walking towards the door.

  
"No. I think i need a break from you Nate. I need time to think about everything, away from you, and Casey."

  
Anger rushed to Nate's face.

  
"So you don't believe me then? This is typical. I give you everything, and i cant even get loyalty in return?"

  
Now anger rushed through Izzie.

  
"Loyalty? You want to talk about loyalty? You weren't loyal enough to even tell me a kiss happened! But you know who was? CASEY!"

  
Izzie didn't quite realize it until she said it out loud, but it was true. Casey could have easily not said a word at no risk to their friendship. But she felt like Izzie had the right to know so she risked it all and told her.

  
"Casey is more loyal than you will ever be"

  
Izzie didn't speak again after that. Unsure of what to do next, she quietly walked out the front door into the dark night.

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
_Casey_

  
This was the first thought that came to Izzie's mind as she woke every morning for two weeks. It was also her last thought as she fell asleep. The two girls had crossed paths at track practice but Casey wouldn't even look her way. Izzie spent most of those practices running ahead of everyone else so they couldn't see her cry.

  
"You look upset. Is it your mother again?"

  
Izzie sat at her grandma's dining room table, with a a hot chocolate in hand. Her grandma always helped her through her problems, maybe she could help her with this one too.

  
"No, its just.....friend trouble, i guess"

  
Her grandma leaned back in her chair.

  
"Oh i hope its not that nice girl from the track team. The one you went to stay with."

  
Izzie looked down at her half empty cup.

  
"Yea, it is."

  
'Well what happened, lets try to figure this all out for you."

  
Izzie was terrified to tell her grandma about Casey and she couldn't quite understand why. She knew her grandma would look at this objectively, but it was a lot of luggage to unload.

  
"Well, the night i stayed over, Nate came and watched a movie. Casey told me that Nate kissed her. But Nate said that Casey kissed him. I'm not sure what to believe anymore."

  
Her grandma took a sip from her coffee mug.

  
"Hmm. What did you do about this?"

  
"I told Casey to leave me alone.....and then a few hours later i broke up with Nate. I guess i just figured i could never know the truth, But if i remove both of them from my life i can figure out which one i still want in it."

  
Izzie's grandma looked a little confused at the younger girls logic, but nodded her head in agreement.

  
"I think removing yourself from the situation is the best thing you could have done. That was a few weeks ago. So let me ask. Do you miss Nate?"

This was a simple question for Izzie to answer.

  
"No. I really don't. He flirts with other girls at school, and honestly it doesn't even bother me. We were so different, our lives were never meant to mix for any longer than they had."

  
Izzie knew the next question, and she didn't want to answer it.

  
"Interesting. Now, Do you miss Casey?"

  
_I miss Casey more than anything in the world._

  
"Yes. I miss her a lot actually."

  
Izzie voice cracked, and she was on the verge of tears as she said it. Her grandmas nodded, already knowing the answer before the question was asked. She asked another.

  
"Do you love her?"

  
"Well yeah. We understand each other in a way no one else can. We aren't like anyone else in that school. Shes my best friend."

  
Her grandma shook her head and put her hand underneath her granddaughters chin, forcing the younger girl to look her in the eye. She needed to understand the question.

  
"No...Not like that. Sweetie....do you love Casey?"

  
Confusion and panic overcame Izzie.

  
_Love? Like in love?_

  
She hadn't really thought about it before. Sure she loved Casey in a friend way. I mean what wasn't there to love. Casey quickly became the person Izzie wanted to turn to in this world. Casey made Izzie laugh even on the worst of days. She was kind, sweet, caring. Izzie always felt safe with her. When Izzie saw her happiest days, past, present, and future, they all included Casey.

  
Izzie's grandma intently watched her granddaughter slowly unravel the mess that was her feelings. Izzie wanted her grandma to help her figure stuff out. But now she was even more confused than before.

  
"I just- i just know that i'm terrified i'm losing her."

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Later that night Izzie lay wide awake in her bed. She held her phone in her hand knowing that the one person she wanted to wouldn't be texting her. She had tried typing out long apology messages everyday for the past week, but couldn't allow herself to hit send. Today's conversation with her grandma didn't help at all.She spent he rest of the night thinking about the question that was asked. She didn't know if she was in love with Casey. All she knew was she felt the opposite about Casey as she did with Nate. Her and Casey fit. They worked so well, and everything felt right when they were together.

  
_I need to fix this. I need to get her back._

  
In that exact moment her phone vibrated her hands. Izzie excitedly looked at the screen, confused to see the name that showed up.

  
**Mrs. Gardner: Hey Izzie!! I just wanted to let you know that i am throwing a surprise sweet 16 party for Casey this Friday at the house!!! I hope you can make it!**

  
_SHIT, It was Casey's birthday on Friday...How could that have slipped my mind?_

  
Casey made it clear even months ago she didn't want anything for her birthday. Casey agreed to a girls night with her and Sharice, but that clearly wasn't happening. Izzie's mind started to race. What should she do? She knew Casey didn't want her there, but this was the perfect chance to see her again, to apologize in person.

  
**That sounds great Mrs. Gardner!! I will see you then!**

  
**Mrs. Gardner: Perfect! Please let the other girls know! Casey will be so excited to see you!**

  
_We will see about that._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual, if you like it let me know!! 
> 
> I know this is a shorter chapter so i will be updating mid week as well. Only a few chapters left!!!


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh You Already Know Whats About To Go Down.
> 
>  
> 
> AKA Izzie Attends Casey's Birthday Party

Friday had arrived. Izzie was a little upset to not see Casey at practice. She was anxious to finally get the chance to talk to her. She had already told some of the girls about the party so it was too late to back out now. They decided on taking 2 cars because most of the girls had dates after stopping at Casey's party. Also, Izzie secretly hoped that she could stay after and talk with Casey if things went well. She spent the rest of the week picking out the perfect outfit. She decided on a white T-shirt and black jacket. But the leopard print skirt and hoop earrings really put it over the top. The last time she showed up to Casey's house she was in Sweats, so this was an improvement.

  
Quinn took forever to get ready so they finally arrived as the house well after the initial surprise. The group walked in the door, and Izzie was blown away. There were so many people, and her mom and put decorations up everywhere. But what really took her breath away was Casey dancing with Sam in the middle of the room. Casey wore a red white and blue stripped polo shirt and jean shorts that were tight around her thighs. Her hips were swaying back and forth to find Sam's. She looked beautiful, and Izzie couldn't look away. She forgot she had brought people with her until they spoke up.

  
"Wow, super cool dance moves."

  
"I love candy in a cup."

  
Casey froze dead on the dance floor and slowly turned around to face her. Izzie smiled, even though a mix of anger and fear was over Casey's face, this was the first time Casey had looked her way in weeks.

  
"Hey, Newton. Hey, Sam."

  
Sam looked genuinely confused as to why Izzie was there. Casey looked like she was about to break down, as she ran out of the room and into the kitchen.

  
_This is not going according to plan_

  
Izzie and the girls remained standing in the doorway, unsure of what to do. Izzie knew Casey wouldn't be overjoyed to see her here, but she didn't think it would be this bad. Within minutes Casey emerged from the kitchen, and walked through the party area avoiding contact with everyone. It wasn't until she reached the steps by the entry way that Sam had caught up to her.

  
"Wait!"

  
He had his headphones on so he didn't realize how much he was yelling, but it was loud enough for Izzie to hear.

  
"We have to find the Ickle Bickle. Evan didn't even go up there, you nut."

  
_What the hell is an ickle bickle?_

  
Casey turned to look at Sam. Izzie could already see the tears in the other girls eyes

  
"LEAVE ME ALONE! I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE ICKLE BICKLE OR ANY OF YOUR STUPID RITUALS."

  
Sam calmly looked at his younger sister, completely unaware of why she was lashing out at him, but accepting the yelling just the same.

  
"IT'S NOT EVEN ABOUT ME"

  
Everyone else in the room shut up. The room was silent aside from the music, and Casey screaming. She was yelling in between her sobs.

  
"ITS JUST ABOUT SAM, SAM, SAM, JUST LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE IN MY SORRY-ASS LIFE. "

  
Casey stopped yelling and turned slightly to make eye contact with Izzie. The taller girl looked at her with a rage that could have exceeded Steve's. But Izzie knew Casey wouldn't hurt her. Even after everything that happened, Izzie still felt safe. Casey broke the eye contact, and ran up the stairs crying. Sam walked outside as if he were looking for something.

  
"Well this party is obviously a dud. Lets get out of here."

  
_Of course Quinn is leading the charge to leave. She has a hot date._

  
The girls all gathered up by the door. Izzie didn't move an inch.

  
"Actually guys, I think I'm going to stay here."

  
The rest of the group looked annoyed. They didn't understand Izzie's desire to come to the party in the first place and now she wanted to stay, after that? But they accepted Izzie's request and left her alone. Izzie wasn't sure what to do now that everyone had left. The only person she knew here was Evan and Sam. She didn't want to talk to Evan, and had no idea where Sam even was. She stood awkwardly in the door way. She hadn't left that spot since she came in.

  
_This was such a stupid idea. I should have never come here. If i slip out no one will notice. Maybe if i leave her night will turn around._

  
It wasn't long before Sam ran in from outside through the living room towards the stairs.

  
"ICKLE BICKLE BEANSTALK! ICKLE BICKLE BEANSTALK!"

  
Sam slowed to a stop as he approached Izzie.

  
"Look! I Found it! I found the Ickle Bickle!"

  
Izzie looked towards Sam's hand to find a small gorilla figurine in his hand. He stood triumphantly in front of Izzie like a solider about to be knighted.

  
"Way to go Sam! Where are you going with it?"

  
"I'm going to show Casey! My mom said i was making today about me, which i wasn't. Today was about the ritual. But I agreed that i would apologize to Casey so that is where I am going."

  
Izzie had no idea about any ritual, but she knew a lot about apologizing. She knew it was now or never. Sam started to walk up the stairs as Izzie put her hand put to block the steps.

  
"Sam, do you think maybe i could go up and apologize first?"

  
Sam contemplated the request, thinking very hard if this was something he could do.

  
"Well I told my mom that i would apologize, but i didn't say when. Besides today is about Casey, and i know she would want to see you more than me. Yes, you can go first."

  
Sam was a logical thinker. If he thought that Casey wanted to see her, than it must be true.

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie approached Casey's bedroom door. She didn't know what she was going to say, but she knew she had to say something. Her palms were sweating, so she wiped them off on her skirt before knocking on the door.

  
"Leave me alone, Mom or Evan."

  
Impulses....Izzie opened the door. Casey was laying on her back staring at the ceiling. She had a party noise maker next to her face.

  
"Hey. Can I come in?"

  
Casey shot up into a sitting position the second Izzie started to talk. Her face was changing expressions so much that Izzie couldn't get a read on what she was going to say.

  
"Okay."

  
_Phase one complete._

  
Izzie smiled. She walked fully into the room putting her hands behind her back to softly shut the bedroom door. It had been so long since they talked, since Casey looked at her without anger. Izzie was afraid to look away.

  
"Your brother's all jazzed up because he found this creepy little gorilla thingy."

  
"It's the Ickle Bickle."

  
Her hands were still sweating, so Izzie put them in her jacket pocket as she cautiously walked closer to Casey.

  
"Yeah. That's what he told me. I like you guys."

  
Casey said nothing and turned her head away as if it physically pained her to look at Izzie. Izzie panicked, and moved closer to the bed. She would have to dive right into this apology.

  
"Dude, I'm sorry. About everything."

  
She was finally getting to apologize.

  
"I was a dick and I got jealous, and I was afraid of losing someone that I love."

  
Casey became defensive yet spoke as adamantly as when she first told Izzie.

  
"I would never come between you and Nate."

  
_This has nothing to do with Nate._

  
"Screw him. No, I was afraid of losing you."

  
Casey was taken aback, and Izzie could have sworn that the statement literally took the other girls breath away.

  
"Oh."

  
Izzie kept trying to look Casey in the eye, but every time their eyes met, She panicked and looked away.

  
"I just- Before you got to Clayton, I felt so out of place, like I couldn't be myself. And with Nate, our lives are just so different."

  
"Like, he's a huge douche and you're not?"

  
Izzie allowed a quick pause before providing a serious answer.

  
"Yes."

  
Both girls laughed at the joke that was 100% accurate. But Izzie wasn't done apologizing. She needed Casey to know how she felt.

  
"And then you and I got into that big fight and we stopped talking.

  
Casey's smile diminished and she looked down at the thought of the fight.

  
"And... I missed you."

  
Casey finally looked up.

  
"I, like, really, really missed you."

  
Tears starting forming in Casey's eyes, and for the first time in a while Izzie knew there was hope for them.

  
"And I just want my girl back."

  
_My Girl._

  
Casey smiled, but anxiety got the best of Izzie. She was kicking herself for saying it, but proud that she did.

  
"Sorry if that sounds stalkerish."

  
Casey laughed at the statement.

  
"It does. But I feel the same. So it's cool."

  
_She feels the same way....But about missing me, or does she feel the same way about everything? Did she feel like her world would implode without me? Did she feel just how amazing things always seem to be when we are together?_

  
The girls sat an arms length away from each other in silence. Izzie still wasn't sure what she was feeling for Casey, but she knew that she needed to be closer to her. She just needed an excuse.

  
"Let's forehead promise to never leave each other again."

  
Izzie smiled at her sudden idea. Casey was cautious yet intrigued.

  
"Okay. What is that?"

  
"Come here, I'll show you."

  
Izzie stood up and realigned herself to face Casey better, while also moving much closer. She fixed her hair and stared at Casey, their eyes locking.

  
_Fuck. She is so beautiful_

  
Casey stared at Izzie not knowing what to do or what to expect. Izzie couldn't take her eyes off of the taller girl, and she felt like she was loosing control of her own body. She bit her bottom lip, before leaning her face towards Casey's. Her lips were moving directly for Casey's, and Casey's were moving towards hers. Izzie panicked, and tilted her head back allowing the girls foreheads to meet. Both girls began to giggle at the thought of the forehead promise, but their heads stayed connected.

  
"That's it."

  
Izzie didn't know where to look but did her best to avoid looking at Casey despite their faces being inches apart.

  
"Is it obvious that I just made this up?"

  
Both girls continued to giggle because the answer to Izzie's question was obvious. Izzie couldn't help but look at Casey, her eyes moving back and forth between the eyes and lips of the girl sitting across from her. Izzie was overcome with the feeling that they still weren't close enough. Both girls stopped laughing. Finally aware that the other was feeling the same way. Izzie stared at Casey's lips, only looking to her eyes to see they were fixated on her own lips. Izzie bit her bottom lip before closing her eyes and allowing her impulses over take her. She leaned into Casey, who was leaning back. Izzie felt the other girls nose graze her own, and both girls inhaled quickly at the touch. They both craved more. She felt the small breaths leave Casey's mouth as she moved closer. And then the door opened.

  
"Hey, Casey, I -"

  
Just centimeters away from satisfying the craving they were both feeling, the girls separated as quickly as possible. Casey shifted back and away from Izzie, who was trying to catch her breath from what almost happened.

  
"Mom."

  
_Did she see us?_

  
Mrs. Gardner stood in the doorway, unsure of what to do or say.

  
"Oh, sorry. I just I just wanted to let you know that cake's ready."

  
Casey played the whole thing off very nonchalantly.

  
"Yeah, we're gonna be down in a second."

  
While Izzie nervously rubbed her hands together, but keeping a smile on her face.

  
"Hi, Mrs. Gardner."

  
Casey's mom smiled at the girls before walking away and shutting the door behind her. Giving the girls back the privacy that she had interrupted. But it was too late. As soon as the door shut the smiles faded and worry replaced them. The two girls refused to look at each other, both knowing what just happened between them, and not knowing what it meant. They continued to avoid each other until Casey finally stood.

  
"We should probably go down stairs."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
The two girls slowly walked down the steps. Izzie taking the lead, one step ahead of Casey. Izzie looked at the floor as she walked, and as she move further down the stairs, looked to the wall to avoid making eye contact with anyone. As she came to the landing Casey walked to her side, and past her. Izzie looked up to see Casey walking right towards Evan.

  
_Evan...._

  
"Hey."

  
"Hey."

  
"I'm sorry I was being lame earlier."

  
"Yeah, it's -"

  
Casey leaned in and kissed Evan with an assertiveness that Izzie could only crave. She wrapped her arms around Evans neck and the kiss grew. Izzie felt like she was being punched in the stomach. This wasn't something she wanted to see. Izzie walked to the small crowd of people that were left at the party. She saw Casey's dad walk towards a two tiered cake with a lighter.

  
"All right, you guys, come on. Let's have some cake."

  
Casey walked towards the group hand in hand with Evan, until she broke free and took her place in between him and Izzie. As Mr. Gardener lit the candles everyone starting to sing.

  
"Happy birthday to you -"

  
Mrs. Gardener walked into the center of the circle they all formed.

  
"No, no singing."

  
She looked towards her daughter, desperate to fix this night.

  
"Casey hates the "Happy Birthday" song, right?"

  
Izzie looked to Casey and smiled at the site of her. She also saw Evan and immediately felt jealous.

  
"Yeah. Thanks for remembering."

  
Suddenly Sam spoke up. He still had his headphones on, even though the room was very quiet.

  
"Okay, let's sing "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" instead. I'll start."

Izzie's shoulder tapped Casey's back as she smiled at the taller girl. Izzie liked this new tradition.

  
"Twinkle, twinkle, little star How I wonder what you are"

  
The group joined in on Casey's new birthday song. Sharice walked towards Casey. She literally walked into Izzie as she put her arm around the birthday girl. Izzie had no choice but to take a step back, and moving away from Casey was the last thing Izzie wanted to do.

  
"Up above the world so high Like a diamond in the sky Twinkle, twinkle, little star How I wonder what you are"

  
Despite Izzie's wants, Casey moved further away still to join her brother and mother.

  
"Thanks for the party, Mom."

  
"Honey, I'm so sorry."

  
Izzie was glad things were looking up for Casey and her mom. Despite everything that happened, Izzie could tell that Casey's family genuinely loved each other.

  
"No, it's okay. "Really.

  
Izzie stood next to Sharice and Evan, looking on as Casey shared a moment with her mom.

  
_This is an incredible family_

  
"This is a weird family."

  
Izzie cringed in disagreement of Evans comment. Sharice quickly changed the subject back with another statement that Izzie didn't completely agree with.

  
"Yeah. But doesn't Casey look pretty?"

  
_No. She looks gorgeous._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suprise! :) 
> 
> One more chapter left!!!!
> 
> If you love it, let me know!!!


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here we are....The final chapter.

Izzie hadn't slept in days. She laid in bed for hours, becoming more and more tired. but sleep never came. Her mind raced, replaying that night over and over again in her head.

  
_What would have happened if Casey's mom hadn't have walked in? How far would it have gone?_

  
The sound of morning alarms chimed from the phone, as Izzie slowly got up to start her day. If it wasn't finals week, she was certain that she wouldn't have even gotten out of bed. On the bright side, she would finally get to see Casey again today. They both had a math final today, and a history test on Friday. Izzie was glad that she had been studying for her math final before the party, because if she had waited, her mind wouldn't have retained anything.

  
Since the party, the two girls had texted back and forth, but what happened in Casey's room was never brought up. Izzie took that as a sign to drop the whole thing. She was still confused on the matter, but was too scared to actually ask Casey about it. Still she was thankful to have Casey back in her life again.

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie was one of the last people to finish her exam. Math was never her strong suite, so she was just proud of herself for finishing it in the allotted time. Izzie handed her test in and walked out of the classroom and was surprised to find Casey sitting in the hall.

  
"You waited for me Newton?"

  
She figured the taller girl would have been long gone by now.

  
"Yeah well.....I'm waiting for my dad to come pick me up."

  
_Oh._

  
"I mean, I would have waited for you anyway, but i have my drivers test this afternoon."

  
_So many tests in one day._

  
Izzie would have been lying if she said she wasn't disappointed. The taller girl reached her hand towards Izzie, in an effort to stand up. Her phone started to vibrate in her hand.

  
"Well, hes here. In a few hours i should be licensed driver!"

  
"Good then you can finally drive me places!"

  
"Driving Miss Izzie...Its got a nice ring to it! Wish me luck!"

  
The two girls both leaned in for a hug. Their arms and bodies, matched together perfectly like 2 puzzle pieces. The hug only last a few seconds before Izzie could feel Casey pull away. She felt the difference in the interaction. It was guarded..scared. Still she looked up to the taller girl with a smile.

  
"Good Luck."

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie sat on her bed trying remember that the assassination of Arch Duke Frans Ferninand was the spark that started WWI. This studying was a lost cause.

  
_When am i actually going to need to know this stuff in the real world?_

  
Izzie felt her phone vibrating and began searching through her blankets on the bed to find it.

  
**Newton: I PASSED!!!! THE WORLD IS NOW MY OYSTER!!!**

  
**OMG!! That's amazing!! We should celebrate!!!**

  
**Newton: I would, but i promised Evan we would hang out.**

  
_Evan..._

**No, that's cool. Maybe tomorrow? I could use some help studying for the history test?**

  
**Newton: It will be like the blind leading the blind but yeah! I need to study too!**

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie had spent the day studying. Minus a break for lunch and another to run a few miles. With track season being over, Izzie still needed to get her energy out every day. Usually her time running helped to clear her head, but lately it just brought on new questions. She couldn't get Casey out of her head, and she couldn't figure out why. She couldn't figure out why or how they almost kissed.

  
_Drunk girls kiss each other all the time. Although we weren't drunk. And it didn't feel like a meaningless drunk kiss. It felt real. It felt.....right._

  
After her run, and shower, Izzie decided to extend her study break some more. She grabbed her phone.

  
**Newton!!! We on for studying tonight?!**

  
Izzie began typing again before she received an answer.

  
_**I'm so excited to finally hang out with you just us! Its been forever!** _

  
**Newton: Cant tonight. family stuff.**

  
She deleted what she was typing, and retyped a new message in it's place.

  
**Oh, Okay. I hope everything is okay.**

  
Casey never responded. Izzie decided she could figure this out on her own if she really focused. The test was tomorrow, so she unplugged the TV, the computer, and put her phone on silent. She needed to concentrate. But as the hours went by, her mind kept making its way back to Casey.

  
**How's family time**

  
**Newton: Same old same old.**

  
Things were off between them. Was it because of the kiss, or was it something else?

  
Ugh i should have never texted her. Everything is ruined.

  
Izzie shut her history book, grabbed her IPod and sneakers, and went out for a run. She ran for miles and miles as the music flowed through her and the worries, and anxieties exited her as fer feet hit the pavement. She finally made her way back to the house, and for the first time in almost a week. She laid down and fell right to sleep.

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie stared at her test paper. None of the questions made any sense. She had been studying nonstop but it was like none of it stuck.

  
_I don't remember going over the 1950's at all!_

  
She looked around the room, and saw Casey filling in little ovals with her pencil. Izzie had been running late this morning, so she didn't have a chance to talk to Casey before the test. At this point it was probably for the best since every interaction they have had lately just opens the door for more questions. Izzie read through the test one last time before standing up to hand it in. she was happy to see Casey stand up as well. The two girls made eye contact as they set the test papers on the desk at the front of the room. They both grabbed their bags, and walked side by side into the hall way. Casey stopped suddenly causing Izzie to run into her.

  
"I'm sorry about last night."

  
Casey looked down to the floor when she said it. She looked sad, like a puppy getting scolded for making a mess. This made Izzie even more confused.

  
"No worries Newton. What are you up to now? We could go get celebratory end of the year Slurpee?"

  
Casey took her phone out of her pocket, and turned it back on.

  
"Yeah, that sounds gre-"

  
Suddenly her phone started chiming over and over again. Different sounds for texts, missed calls, and voicemails creating a symphony of sounds. Casey immediately starting tapping at her screen, and Izzie could see the panic in her eyes, the more she saw.

  
"Sam ran away."

  
Casey looked towards Izzie, while already turning to walk away. Izzie followed her and the speed they walked got faster and faster.

  
"Wait what? Why, Where?"

  
Casey turned towards Izzie with tears in her eyes.

  
"I DON'T KNOW!!! I'VE BEEN IN THAT STUPID TEST. ALL I KNOW IS THAT HES GONE!!!!!"

  
Izzie stopped dead in her tracks. Casey's eyes softened and filled with regret as she realized what had just happened.

  
"Iz, I'm- I'm so sorry. I just don't kn-"

  
Izzie put her hand on the taller girls cheek and wiped away a stray tear that was still falling.

  
"It's okay. Go find him. If there's anything I can do, let me know."

  
With Izzies blessing, Casey turned and started to run down the hallway, and out into the courtyard where they had first met.

  
_I hope he's alright._

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
**Newton: We found him. He was at the aquarium with his penguin.**

  
**He has a penguin?**

  
**Newton: Long story....but yes he does.**

  
**That's actually really cool. Why did he run away in the first place?**

  
**Newton: Well. Some ass hats as his school wrote these awful things in his yearbook, and he broke down.**

  
**WTF. Who's ass do i have to kick? Like who the hell does that?**

  
**Newton: No i think his friend Paige has the ass kicking down. Lucky for them, because i would have done it myself.**

  
Izzie couldn't help but think of what a great little sister Casey was to Sam. Even though she was younger, she took on a lot more of the responsibility and looking out for Sam, and she had no one to do that for her. Izzie made a mental note that she would always look out for Casey.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
It was officially summer vacation, and Izzie decided to treat herself by sleeping in. It may be awful that Steve is back in the house, but that also meant her mom was too. Izzie was no longer responsible for her siblings, at least for now. Step one in this freedom, is not having to wake up with the baby.

  
It was 11:20am on the first day of summer vacation, and Izzie was already bored. The girls from the track team were already off jet setting to Rome, or Paris or something. She found herself looking through her pictures. Now was the perfect time to delete all the random screen shots she had taken in the past month. As she was scrolling through, she came across a picture of her and Casey. Casey had a cheesy smile, while Izzie's mouth gaped open. It looked like nothing could bring the two girls down. It was a picture from the sleep over.

  
_We looked so happy_

  
Izzie couldn't help but gush a bit over the picture. She remembered how Casey cheered her up that night. Even with everything that happened after, and the heartache and pain it caused everyone involved, Izzie would always look back on that night with a smile. She had to send this to Casey.

  
**Found this on my phone HAHA**

  
**Newton: hang out later?**

  
_Finally._

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The two girls sat in Casey's mom's car under a lamp post in the 7-Eleven parking lot.

  
"I can't believe we drove four towns away just to find a 7-Eleven that serves cotton candy Slurpees."

  
More so, Izzie couldn't believe Casey would drive around that much, just for her to have her favorite Slurpee. She had told the taller girl multiple times, that any other flavor would be fine. She she continued to search, checking every gas station on their way.

  
"I have no regrets."

  
Izzie laughed while slurping on her frozen drink.

  
"So guess what? I had sex again."

  
The words stung Izzie's heart as she heard them. She didn't want to know anything Casey did with anyone else. The realization of this confused her even more.

  
"With Evan?"

  
"No, with myself. Still counts, though, right?"

  
The pure thought of that, set Izzie internally on fire. She laughed to cover up this sensation, and her voice cracked when she forced herself to speak. She didn't think she could look at Casey right now.

  
"Shut up."

  
Both girls giggled, and took a sip in unison, until Casey took on a more serious tone.

  
"Yeah, with Evan. I really love him."

  
Now Izzie was certain she couldn't look at Casey. She leaned back on the head rest staring straight ahead. She didn't want to hear those words, even though she knew them to be true.

  
"I know you do."

  
"It's just, sometimes a thing feels, like so right. You know?"

  
_What is she saying? Is she saying what i think she saying?_

  
Izzie bit her bottom lip as realized in this moment that that is exactly how she felt about Casey. She had never felt anything in comparison to what she felt with her. Everything felt right. She did have feelings for Casey, she was in love.

  
As much as she wanted to, Izzie forced herself not to look at Casey. She was too nervous, her stomach was doing somersaults. She allowed her arm to fall, as her hand rested gently on the emergency brake that separated her from the driver. Her impulses took over as her hand inched it's way to Casey's.

  
She felt Casey's bare skin on her own, and lost her breath. She wasn't sure what would happen next, but she knew she was risking it all to be true to herself and her feelings. She extended her pinky finger out to Casey who quickly moved her hand away. Izzie moved her hand closer in an attempt to stop her. Casey slowly moved her hand back, and curved her pinky to allow Izzie's to wrap around it. Izzie looked out the passengers side window , as she continued to bite her bottom lip. She wasn't sure if Casey was looking at her, but she was too terrified to check.

  
The two girls sat in silence and Izzie cupped the top of Casey's hand in hers. Izzie could feel the pressure of Casey's thumb gently squeezing her hand back as she finally allowed herself to breathe.

  
_This is happening. This is seriously happening._

  
Izzie's heart was beating so hard, she was certain Casey could hear it. She pulse was so strong, that Casey had to have been able to feel it. She continued to avoid looking at the taller girl, afraid that eye contact would end the moment. Almost in unison, both girls flipped their hands so their palms faced each other, and in one fluid motion, allowed their fingers to intertwine. It was a simple action, but spoke volumes to Izzie. She had never felt closer to someone.

  
Suddenly the sound of a vibrating phone broke the silence in the car. Izzie was certain that their moment was over as she could hear Casey move in her seat to grab the phone. Izzie wasn't sure who was calling but she had a guess.

  
_Evan._

  
Izzie mentally prepared herself for the heartache that would come when Casey let go of her hand, but it didn't come. Casey maintained contact as she picked up her phone. Izzie could see the other girl out of the corner of her eye pick up and stare at the phone. Casey tapped her phone screen, causing the vibrating to stop. Izzie forced her eyes to look forward as she could hear Casey put the phone back into the small section of the door handle.

  
_She ignored the call. She has to feel the same way. She wouldn't be holding my hand if she didn't. What about Evan? But what about us?_

  
Izzie's hand was twitching slightly in the panic of everything. This all seemed to good to be true, and despite everything that had just happened, she was still filled with self doubt. She started convincing herself that this was all in her head, until she felt Casey gently squeeze her hand a little more to calm her trembling hands. Both girls continued to look forward as their hands intertwined in a more passionate yet innocent way than Izzie had ever experienced before. She wasn't sure what was going to happen next but there was one thing she knew for certain.

  
_I cant lose her._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. What a journey!!!! I want to give a huge thanks to everyone who read, commented, and gave those precious kudos!!! 
> 
>  
> 
> I'm not sure if I will be written any more content in the near future, but follow me on tumblr (while its still a thing) @TurnYourWoundsIn2Wisdom. if i write anything i will certainly post it there!!!

**Author's Note:**

> love it? let me know!!! Most of the story has already been worked out in my head so I should be updating semi frequently.


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